


It's an Odd Language

by RandomFandomJasper



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (2020)
Genre: Sonic The Hedgehog - Freeform, maddie wachowski - Freeform, sonic movie, sonic wachowski - Freeform, tom wachowski - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-23
Updated: 2020-03-23
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:34:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23286352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RandomFandomJasper/pseuds/RandomFandomJasper
Summary: It's starts out innocently enough, just a chat about superheroes. But when Sonic forgets a word, it sparks an entirely new discussion, one that Sonic is kind of embarrassed to open up about.
Comments: 25
Kudos: 340





	It's an Odd Language

**Author's Note:**

> I made a Tumblr post about Sonic's first language and how, realistically, it probably wasn't English because... he's an alien. So I decided to write this an I think it got out of hand, but here it is anyhow.

"Dash  _ really _ isn’t your favorite character from  _ The Incredibles _ ?” Tom asked. “I kinda figured he would be, all things considered.”

Sonic drummed his fingers against the table absently. “Nah. I mean, Dash was cool, but I can already do all that stuff.” He scowled. “Plus, that running on water thing was totally unrealistic.”

Tom shrugged. “Maybe he’s just faster than you.”

He rolled his eyes. “Trust me, he’s not. And even if he was--which he _isn’t_ \--it’s not about _speed_ , it’s about _gravity._ He’s too heavy to stay on top of the water for that long.”

Maddie opened the refrigerator to grab the milk. “He’s gotta point. There’s a lizard that can run on water, but not for very long. Being light and fast only works for so long. Dash definitely should have sank.”

“ _ Thank _ you,” Sonic said. “See, Donut Lord? Pretzel Lady agrees, and she’s an expert.”

Tom waved a hand flippantly. “Ah, you guys are just taking it too seriously. It’s a movie about superheroes. Physics don’t apply.”

“Well, maybe they should,“ Maddie commented. “You boys want any milk while I have it out?”

Sonic raised his hand enthusiastically. “Yes, please!”

“I’m good, thanks.” Tom looked at Sonic expectantly. “So if Dash isn’t your favorite, mind sharing who is?

Maddie handed Sonic his glass of milk and sat down at the table with them. “I’m a fan of Elastigirl, personally.”

Sonic laughed. “Yeah, she is  _ definitely _ awesome.” He took a quick sip of milk. “But my favorite was actually Frozone.”

Tom blinked. “Wait, seriously? He wasn’t even a main character.”

“So?”

“He froze a cop!” Tom protested.

“Yeah,” Sonic said. “And it was hilarious.”

Maddie smiled. “That can’t be the  _ only _ reason you like him.”

Sonic giggled. ”Yeah, you’re right.” He paused to take another drink. “He was also funny, and his powers are  _ really _ cool.”

Tom grinned. “ _ Cool _ , huh?”

“Don’t!” Sonic interrupted. “Stop it! Stop right there.”

“You kinda walked into that one,” Maddie told him.

Sonic huffed. “Whatever.” Then he smiled, irritation already forgotten. “Oh! And also, he’d be so much fun to hang out with!” He made a swooping gesture with his hand. “Could you imagine how much fun it’d be to slide down the… uh... “

Tom and Maddie watched him wave his hand around for a few seconds. “The what?” Tom asked.

“The… slide- hang on, I know the word.” Sonic snapped his fingers .”It’s um… the-” He let out a string of words that decidedly wasn’t English, then threw his hands in the air and shouted, “Cold water!”

“Do you mean  _ ice?” _ Maddie asked.

_ “Yes!” _ Sonic exclaimed. “Geez, that should  _ not _ have been that hard.”

Tom and Maddie glanced at each other. Tom decided he’d be the one to address the burning question. “Hey Sonic? What uh… what language was that?”

Sonic picked his glass of milk back up. “Hm?” His eyes widened slightly in realization. “Oh, it was… it’s just the language I spoke back on my island.”

“Wait, so English  _ isn’t _ your first language?” Tom asked. He felt dumb as soon as the question escaped him. Of  _ course _ English wasn’t his first language, he was an  _ alien. _

But Sonic didn’t seem to care that the question was dumb. He actually looked more embarrassed than anything. “I learned it after I came here. It um… it took a while to learn. Probably took longer than it should have.”

“You didn’t exactly have a school to teach you,” Maddie pointed out. “You were probably just learning by listening to conversations, right?

Sonic slumped in his seat. “Yeah, well, there may have been a few… complications.”

Tom crossed his arms and leaned on the table. “Such as?”

“Humans speak a  _ lot _ of languages,” Sonic said. “And some humans speak more than one language, and use  _ both _ of them in the same conversation.” He looked like he wanted to sink through the floor. “Took a while to figure out the difference.”

Maddie reached over and put a hand on his shoulder. “You don’t have to be embarrassed about it. I think it’s neat that you’re bilingual.”

Sonic stared into his glass. “Didn’t feel very cool,” he mumbled. “You know how long it took me to realize  _ perro _ and  _ dog _ the same thing?”

Tom figured it was probably longer than he wanted to admit. “I’m guessing reading was kind of a pain.”

_ “Kind of?” _ Sonic repeated indignantly. “Do you guys know how  _ ridiculous _ the English language is? It’s the dumbest-” His sentence dissolved into frustrated muttering. Tom caught bits and pieces about the ‘i before e’ rule and how stupid the letters ‘ough’ were.

To be fair, the kid had a point. English was hard to learn even if you had a teacher, but learning it through conversation alone? While on the move? It was his understanding that Sonic hadn’t arrived in Green Hills until a few years ago, but he’d been on Earth for  _ ten. _ He probably heard a lot of…  _ colorful _ language while zipping around the states.

“Anyway,” Sonic said, “Sorry about the slip-up. I can’t believe I still forget simple words like that.”

Maddie frowned. “People forget words all the time, even if they only speak  _ one _ language. That’s not something you have to apologize for.”

“Happens all the time,” Tom agreed. “I once totally forgot what butterflies were called.”

Sonic glanced up at him. “Really?”

“Oh yeah,” Tom said. “I couldn’t think of the word, so I said ‘flappy bumblebee’ instead.”

Both Maddie and Sonic started laughing. “A  _ what _ ? _ ” _ Sonic asked.

“Flappy bumblebee,” Tom repeated. “See? Nothing wrong with forgetting a word every now and then. It usually has hilarious results.”

Sonic put his head down on the table and wheezed. “You have ruined butterflies forever, Donut Lord, I’m gonna think about  _ flappy bumblebee _ every time I see one.”

Maddie shook her head with an amused smile. “Flappy bumblebee… Tom Wachowski, you are an absolute dork.”

“Perhaps,” Tom conceded. “But I am also hilarious. Which is why  _ my _ favorite character is Edna Mode.”

Sonic lifted his head. “The suit lady?”

“Yep,” Tom said. “Master of Sass. I love her.” Sonic seemed to relax as they settled back into their conversation. They’d have to be more mindful about Sonic’s first language in the future. If they did decide to enroll him in school (which was looking pretty likely at this point) they’d have to let his teachers know.

Maybe he and Maddie could learn a little of Sonic’s language too. He wouldn’t mind being a bilingual household. Plus, they could hold entire conversations in public and nobody would know what they were saying.

He zoned back into the conversation just in time to hear Maddie say, “Okay, but we can all agree that Syndrome was the worst character, right?”

“Oh, for sure,” Sonic said immediately.

“Definitely,” Tom agreed. “He looks like a troll doll.”

“He also  _ killed _ a lot of people,” Maddie added. “But yeah. Troll doll just about sums it up. Not gonna lie, it was kinda satisfying to watch him get sucked into that engine.”

Sonic finished off the last of his milk. “Shouldn’t have been wearing a cape.”

Maddie took both of their cups to the sink. “Do you think Frozone’s suit was designed by Edna, too? She seemed to have a monopoly on the suit-making market.”

“Probably,” Tom said. “I don’t think anyone else could make a suit so fitting to his powers. It was cool as ice.”

Sonic groaned, “Oh my  _ god _ , that sucked.”

“Yeesh, kid, if you didn’t like the joke, you could just say so,” Tom teased, “No need to be so cold.”

“One more pun, and I’m screaming,” Sonic warned, “And it’ll be in  _ my _ language, so you won’t even know what I’m saying to you.”

Tom smirked. “I think you need to chill.”

Sonic started to yell, but Maddie put a hand over his mouth. “No you don’t. No bad words.” She looked over at Tom. “But that really  _ was _ bad.”

“I wamfn’t gon’-” Maddie moved her hand so Sonic could speak clearly. “I wasn’t gonna say any bad words.”

“Good,” Maddie said. “Because English has a  _ lot _ of those, and I’m sure your language does too.”

Sonic paused. “You know, I was never very clear on which English words were bad. Like, some of them I know, but others I’m not so sure about, because you guys use a  _ lot _ of different words.” He leaned back in his chair. “Like, is  _ bitch _ a bad word?”

Tom. Could. Not. Breathe. He wanted to tell Sonic that  _ yes _ , bitch was a bad word and he shouldn’t be saying it. But the fact that he had said it at all was sending Tom into hysterics.

“Because people call each other bitch _all_ the time. Seriously. They say it a _lot_ ,” Sonic continued, oblivious to Tom’s silent, hysterical laughter, “And most people don’t seem to care. Some people get mad though, but it doesn’t really _stop_ people from saying bi-”

Maddie put her hand back over Sonic’s mouth. “I want to be mad.” She said, holding back tears of laughter. “I want to be  _ so _ mad, but I just  _ can’t _ .”

Tom finally managed to inhale. “Oh my  _ god! _ Sonic  _ do not _ say that word again!”

Sonic pulled Maddie’s hand away from his face. “Is that a bad word?”

“Kind of,” Maddie said, wiping her eyes, “But it’s definitely a  _ grown-up _ word.”

“Oh… but- hm.” He crossed his arms. “But people use it just… like,  _ casually _ . In conversation.”

Maddie patted the top of his head. “Still a grown-up word, buddy. It’s not very nice.”

“Agh, see? This is what I mean! It’s an insulting grown-up word that kids use to talk to their friends. We don’t have words like that in my language! It’s either an insult or it isn’t.” The young alien sighed. “English is fuckin’ weird.”

_ “Sonic!” _

**Author's Note:**

> ("flappy bumblebee" may or may not be based on true events)


End file.
